Mister Simpson!

Tune: Pat Ballard's "Mister Sandman"

Mister Simpson!
Give it a rest;
We wouldn't buy it,
Unless you confessed.
That explanation
For blood in the Bronco—
You couldn't sell it if you worked for Ronco!
Mister Simpson!
Give us a break;
How much baloney
D'you think we can take?
So please turn off your flack machine—
Mister Simpson, why not come clean?

Mister Simpson!
Give it a rest;
You've told your story,
But we're unimpressed.
That talk of chip shots
Was simply malarkey;
By rights, you should have had to date Old Sparky!
Mister Simpson!
Cut out the jive;
If you'd been elsewhere,
They'd still be alive.
So please turn off that damned machine—
Mister Simpson, don't be obscene!

Mister Simpson!
Bully for you!
You fooled a jury
With rannygazoo.
You put those gloves on
And brought home the bacon;
The Fifth Amendment—and the Truth—got taken!
Mister Simpson!
Here is a flash:
The civil action
Will settle your hash.
So find yourself a cash machine—
Mister Simpson, cough up the green!